So much for a place to heal….Lyme & co doesn’t make me TOTALLY stupid

I went and stayed with an old friend.  Good Christian woman… but I had forgotten she had another streak..

so… I lasted ummm…..just over 4 months there.

While yes it was a free room… It was stressful.  And demeaning.  I don’t think she realized it..  I realky dont.  But while the old me wasn’t fazed by criticism… the sick me can’t tolerate it. Continue reading

Was it 2007 or 1987?

Was it the 2007 bite (s)? Or was that just reinfection?

It could have been any time over my life. Outside all the time. Yardwork and Gardening. Hanging out at the river and the lake. Growing up on the lake, in the country.

Was it when Frontline quit working on my Chow mix, Sheba, in 2001 and I wound up putting her down b/c she turned?

Continue reading

My Lyme Rage Rant for today

My friend Kim over at kimmiecakeskickslyme told me to start writing – that it helps. So I figured I’d give it a shot.

While my posts may not quite meet my former writing standards – this is for me. I’ve got a few followers – but this blog is to journal my thoughts as well as to provide information…..its also one of my many mechanisms for saving info (hence the reblogs)….back to my thoughts.

I am pissed.

Yes, there REALLY IS so much I am grateful for and I’ll write about that soon…. But, lets see if this helps get the anger out first.

I’ve done some self-analysis and a lot of thinking over the past few days – sometimes rational, often-times not but hell, that’s life with Neuro Lyme. Continue reading

Lyme Limbo

That’s where i am at.
After almost 8 years of known infection (based on research and paying for medical records) – and 4 years of being sick…
i.e., 4 years of KNOWING something was wrong…

I got the answer.
In May 2014.

And we set out to do the tests necessary to rule out the other issues. And we did.

And now I wait.

To see if disability is approved.
So i can afford treatment.
Gluten-free and organic food.

Everyone thinks I am crazy.
Except for fellow Lymies – who know the reality.
In a sense I am,
Because its affected my brain – my memory and other “cognitive” processes.
And its affected me physically
just not noticeable at first glance.

life goes on for everyone.
And its passing me by.

As i sit in Lyme Limbo.

WOW – i “kinda” figured this out – damn Lyme bugs

I couldn’t figure out how to “do” the blog thing….so i just journaled on my computer or phone…and occasionally posted some stuff on Facebook (currently de-activated – maybe permanently i haven’t decided).

While I haven’t figured out the “private” posts yet…..i can still post…..b/c i saved them on the computer – like i saved everything thankfully.

And if Lyme wins….well this will still be here….i guess a part of me will survive after all